I have some carrots sauteing on the stove with ginger and as I come around the corner into the library, with 80 board feet of cedar shelving, the aroma of cedar is both intoxicating and hevenly.

Yesterday, the back ordered shelf brakets were picked up at The Container Store, and we also went to Lowes to pick up the cedar plank for the shelves. Sometime today it will all be installed, and we will have 40 feet more of book shelves here in the library. That means I get to buy more books!!

It also means I will have to redesign the filing system and relocate books to their proper places. It's a virgo thing. I will have to do it. Plain and simple fact. I think the categories i have on my booklist will be sufficient, and the booklist will also get updated in the process. I think I hve neglected that the last two loads of books that have been assimilated.

Also on the agenda today is planting the myriad of bulbs I collected at Lowes last week. There are red calla lillies to sprinkle amidst the white ones we already have, a few varieties of day lillies, gladiolas, and a bunch others that were just colorful. Also picked up a couple of hydrangea.

Yesterday I repotted my pencil cactus and added a bunch of donkey's tail starter pieces I got from Gil. He told me you just break off a piece and stick it into the dirt and it will grow and hang over the edge of pots. I think I have near 100 experiments of this going on. Gil also gave me two new banana palms from the cluster of his which all produce fruit. We'll see.

My sunflowers are about 8 inches tall now and I will need to transplant them soon. I also got some green beans and carrots to attempt from seed. Last summer I did banana peppers and cherry tomatoes, so we are trying something different.

Also on the agenda today is laundry. And I think my altar needs a good dusting and cleaning. Might purge clothes, too.

As heard on my voice mail...

"Ms. Rothman, your glasses are in."

Woohoo! I have a pair of narrow black rectangles adorning my face this morning and I am so damn fine. Lesbian chic has arrived.

And I am surfing and listening to the oh-so-fabulous second cd from Norah Jones(again...and again...).

Swoon.

There is some energy shifting within me. I am somewhat bothered that I cannot determine whether it is a positive shift or not. I suppose I can only hope it is to be positive.

Driving home last night I had a feeling of such total loneliness. It washed over me in the weirdest way and tears were streaming down my face. I was not thinking of anything in particular, and as readily as it appeared, it also receded.

I am thinking that perhaps there is a connection to formally separating from my women's group. I think that I need to detox off that energy, but I also know it will just disipate on its own.

Then there is knowing I will see one of my best friends, Trisha, in just under a month. We will be going to Las Vegas for her wedding and I have not seen her in about six years. Thinking of it makes me miss her a lot.

Also, thinking about getting married in Boston in September has me dizzy in some respect. It is the ultimate combination of overwhelmed and alive. While there I will see my best friend Kim who I have not seen in five years. Seeing her is always a mixed bag because it is just never enough. Something inside me rips at saying good bye to her.

I need to focus on the good and all the upcoming events we have tickets for. Listening to Norah Jones is working, too.

So it is week two for the new Weight Watchers trials. I managed to stay even which is really a blessing as I managed also to rid the freezer of the last of those evil Girl Scout Cookies. I ate an entire box of the chocolate peanut butter patties after being very good at a ladies who brunch gathering. It is a new week and hopefully I will have some damn discipline and behave.

In addition to seeing kd lang May first, and then Melissa Etheridge May sixteenth, I think it is, I just scored a pair of tickets to see Sarah McLachlan July something or other. Woohoooooooooooo...

Sarah tickets definitely make up for potentially missing Sting and Annie Lennox, yes they are touring together OMIGOD!

Umm, yeah...I am guilty of ordering from both tonight as I was distracted by links to them when reading this info about how to marry in MA.

Plans need to be made pronto!!

How bout thisorder?

Placed yourorder yet?

Uh oh. Now I have done it. I just sent an email off to my women's group with an announcement that I am leaving and a few of the reasons why. I am feeling both sad about it and relieved. The relief is definitely the leading emotion, and I can almost feel it washing over me. Can't you just hear kd lang crooning "Wa-ash, wash me clean..."?

Perhaps now I will be able to resume a more active writing stance. I had not realized before this week as I was contemplating this decision, just how much this has (perhaps) impeded my writing for the past five months. I am feeling ready to get it together in some way. Organize with intent on seeking out a book deal. I have always fely that the Alex story has some sort of potential to be fulfilled, and perhaps a collection of my work is the angle to be pursued. No way to find out but to jump into the deep end, and I feel this happening almost as I type.

The weight of these decisions really caused me to over indulge today. I will have to be back on track, tomorrow being a new day. E and I have both recently recommitted to Weight Watchers, following the plan at home, not attending meetings, and we said if we were not consistently losing by the Vegas trip, we would rejoin and go weekly to the center. We weigh in each Monday morning and I was -5 this past Monday, so we are off to a good start.

So what else is going on...

Spring seems to be bringing on some concerts for us to attend. kd lang is May 1, Melissa Etheridge is May 16, there is some artsy thing we have tix for this month, Vegas is mid April...no tix yet for Sting and annie LEnnox whi are not here until September, but we are likely going to plan the honeymoon around that in case we can get a pair. Additionally, I think we might get our rings from good ole JCP this Friday. I am looking at a triangle cut Amethyst and a band of Opals, as well as doing some more looking on my lunch tomorrow.

We finally bought a new mattress set today as well and will be sleeping on it tomorrow night...yeehaw!!!

Tickets secured!!

Saturday morning. Odd for me to not have blogged for an entire week. I started back to yoga this week and had all ntentions of going this morning, but Melissa Etheridge tickets go on sale at 10 am, so I need to be home to do that. She is performing here at Numbers, a very small club, no seating, lots of beer...it is going to sell out quickly.

Beyond needing to get tickets, I generally feel like crap. Aunt Flo was just visiting, I have some extreme allergy sinus crud going on, and there is still some sort of residual funk energy hanging around. My boss told me yesterday at about I that I could go home because I looked like I felt. I stayed only because I had an eye doctor appointment after work on the way home. My new glasses will be available in 7-10 days. Woohoo...

Still feels like the verge of something happening...something grand.

Last night at Slick Willie's, our favorite pool hall located in Montrose, we were entertained forst by a table of baby dykes, next to us on one side, then by a couple of hootchie mamas on the other side.

The baby dykes, of course had to have at least one person in their group be 18 to even get a table, but there is no way that all of them were 18. I would guess most of them at about 15-17. True babies, really. They shot pool for less than an hour, likely having pooled their allowance to afford to do so. I can imagine the "Oh yeah, we go their all the time" stories they can now tell to the rest of their associates with a slim margin of legitimacy.

We watched as the six of them strolled out the door after paying and all got into a bright red firebird convertible, new model, likely belonging to the driver's mom or dad.

As soon as they left, the table of hootchie mamas and friends seemed to arrive. They were also quite young, but not really of a class to pull of the title of hootchie. short tight skirts, tight half shirts, heels of 3 inches perhaps, and bad weaves all around. The entourage of these two women seemed only partially interested, likely because the evening, for them, was still quite young.

While there, I purchased a 'RACK-EM' t-shirt where rack-em is type on a license plate which surely will ride across my...err...rack.

Wide awake. Oh yeah.

I was just chatting with my cousin Wes. It seems the Golden Girls, my mom, his mom and a third sister of theirs, might have a notion to pop on over to Tex-ass. They left NJ afew weeks ago on the way to FL for six or so weeks of relaxation in the sun. They are 58, 71, and 79 I think. No definite plan, just an idea and a Rand McNally. I certainly hope I get a call before they are on the way. I imagine they will swing west through Leesville, LA as their fourth sister lives there.

Wes also mentioned that they said something about Vegas. I just hope they do not get there before me and win all the money.

What a blog slacker I have been. Of course, there has not been too much going on. Really, there has been a lot going on, just nothing sensational and bloggish.

On Friday night we went toGoGirls and listened to one and a half of the 4 bands. We decided e much prefer the more acoustic performers, perhaps a nod to our old age...hah!

Then on Saturday afternoon we went to see Twelfth Night at the Alley. As it seems to be a pattern for us, we left at intermission having seen enough, but it really was quite enjoyable. before the show we had lunch at St Pete's...yummy colossal shrimp. I would link them but there site is just sorry.

Continuing the pattern, on Sunday evening we ent to see Gypsy Spirit at Jones Hall. It was sort of the Romanian Gypsy version of Riverdance. Singing, dancing, etc and the first act was enjoyable, but an hour was enough. Leaving got us home in time for The L Word. New must see tv.

Then of course followed two long work days and here I find myself having to decide between going to a cafe to write and going shopping. Shopping is winning at the moment.