Nurse Colleen gets a gold star...

The prep was truly far worse than the colonoscopy. The rest of the office staff need to take notes, bnecause frankly, they suck. If you are a client at a digestive disease center, well, just a smile and a kind word would go a long way. Nurse Colleen is well aware of this. The rest of them...aren't. I cut a bit of slack to LaDon, she was my procedure nuirse and other than the fact she could not get my vein on the first two tries, she was at least pleasant.

In addition to the less than accomodationg office staff, the doc was running behind. Hah!! I just made a funny. My procedure was scheduled for 11:30 and I was supposed to begin the intake setup at 10:30. I was taken to a bed at 11:45. Late.

As I already mentioned, Nurse LaDon missed my vein. Twice. Another colleague came over and got it on the first try. The last time I needed an IV I had remembered that my veins roll and I should always ask for an expert. That was 10 years ago and there was too much else on my mind, so I forgot. Ooopsie.

Soon after my IV was in I was wheeled tot he procedure room. The doc was ready and waiting by then. As she was asking if my meds had been in long enough to be working, the nurse said they were not in yet. I never felt any noticable difference, but the procedure was uncomfortable in a subtle way. Not torturous. Not painful. The worst part of it was the air they shoot in to keep the colon from collapsing.

Gaseous. Gaseosity. Pffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffttt.

Lest I be accused of blogging to avoid the joy that is my new medication, That's all for now...More soon.

Pinning all my hopes on the nurse...

Let's just hope she knows what the hell she is talking about. She advised me that the worst part of the procedure is the prep the day before. I already knew what a nightmare that would be from the detox I did with Dr Rob. Feel my shudders.

I want to go to the fridge and bury myself into the container of buttercream icing. Not because I really want it, there is no appetite. But it would surely be soothing. Ii might be ravenous in the morning, but at the moment I am surviving on the cup of chicken broth I had for lunch. That was pre cocktail.

My cocktail consisted of 3 tablespoons of Fleet's phospho soda mixed into a can of ginger ale. I think ginger ale might stay forever on the no list of foods not being friendly to my body. As if the 3 pm cocktail was not bad enough, I had to have a second one at 9.

More shudders.

The ama circulating in my head is enough to make me see double. Shuddering more. and Is it cold in here, or what?

One out of four

At least the laundry is done. Mostly. I still need to do some linens and towels.

I am sitting here contemplating washing my car. I don't have to work until 1, so there is time, but am I feeling it? Not really.

Wrecks will be 7 before he calms down from puppyhood and learns how to just chill out. Nola and Sawyer do try to school him, but he just isn't getting it.

Comedy.

Just enough sun

I am fresh from the shower having just returned from the beach. Fabulous. Glorious. And not too pink. I might not be pink at all. I won't know for sure for a couple of hours. I have gotten a little bit of sun here and there in the past couple of weeks, but also, I was a good girl and wore sunscreen. 30 SPF even. I am not sure the brand,Neutrogena I think, but it is a new kind or newer, that is billed as dry sunscreen. I like it. Once rubbed in, it has no greasy residue at all. Also no overpowering fragrance.

I also emailed my bestest reminding her to pack her suit so we can head down to Galveston when she is visiting in two weeks.Woo. Hoo.

Laundry.
Gardening.
Car washing.
House cleaning.

Things to do...

Interview meme

I found this over on Susan stinson's site. She is a wonderful writer, very literary, so go check her oout and buy her books!

1. Leave me a comment saying, "Interview me."
2. I will respond by asking you five questions. I get to pick the questions.
3. You will update your blog with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

I was bored tonight the last hour or so at work...

Consequently, my nails are now what can only be described as hiliter orange. I think the name of the color is Osaka-to-me orange or something equally silly. In the bottle it did not look quite as flourescent as it does on my nails. Nena, as she was leaving for the night, took one look and dug her sunglasses out of her purse.

"Girly" was all she said in her heavy Spanish accent before she turned and walked out of the salon.

I am not at all thrilled with the color and likely will not keep it beyond midday tomorrow, but I think it has pushed me over the decision edge toward yes. As in yes, I will be getting nails again and soon. Maybe it will be a post colonoscopy treat.

Morning comes

I am really liking it when Wrecks sleeps in his crate. He is a restless one otherwise. Last night I went to bed at about 10:30 and he went right in with no drama and he slept through til this morning at 7ish. I just like that. I suppose I might feel badle about it tonight after he has been in his crate from about noon to 9:30, but if I am up late enough I mmight try it. Maybe I will let hime stay out tonight to see if he settles down. If so, and if he doesn't, into the crate he goes.

I think tonight I might try to layout the inserts for the invitations so we can get them into the mail when E gets back. The invitations themselves are done, but we were limited to three lines of twenty characters each. It is looking like a guest list of about forty with us limiting it to family, and I am not sure we can manage that many, but we certainly can't cut it any closer than we already have. Who knew a simple blessing of our union in our home would be such a challenge!

I just made a CD for Ginger of Double Coyote. That is the music for our soiree. She asked if there was anything we would want them to try to learn and Dance Me To The End Of Love as done by Madeleine Peyroux was what came to mind. Otherwise, they are a trio who does jazz, samba sounds and we like whatever they choose.


Six more days...

sigh

solo til thursday pm...that is when the boy returns, at least for his car...his momma, she who is dear *and* sweet, does not return until sunday...don't like it...dealing with it...

Don't like it...

Last time it happened, I didn't like it either. General Hopspital has brought iin a new Carly. When Sara Brown(I think that was her name) chose to pursue other avenues and left the role of Carly on GH, I just didn't like it. Then the new grrl, very young and early in her acting career, Tamara Braun, began to grow on me. Now I have a hard time delineating the time between the two actresses and the character has become her own entity. I realize it is Carly that I like, not necessarily who plays her.

I am no longer as invested in soaps in general and I rarely watch TV anymore in an invested manner. There is currently nothing on TV which I have to watch. GH and carly included. If I am home when it is on, I will watch it if I think about turning on the TV.

So today, I see a new Carly. She looks like a man. Or rather, like she was a man. I went to look up on the GH website to see if this was temporary because the actress was ill. Nope. This is a NuCarly. At least that is how she is referred to on the message board. The biggest complaint there seems to be she sounds like a man. There is an uncanny resemblence, more like this woman might be the old Carly's mother. Or Father.

I will give the character a chance and see down the road what I think. If I think about it further at all.

Austin here we come

Off to the Austin Art Car Parade.

Woohoo...back soon!

And I'm Dreaming Again...

Norah Jones sings..."Lately I just haven't felt myself at all, it's heavy on my mind..."

I am not quite sure what that means in relation to having been feeling out of sorts, but quite often lately, I find that song just roaming the corridors of my brain. Usually when that happens, I dig out the CD and listen to the song on repeat in the car. It makes for an interesting ride to or from work or wherever else I might be heading. Today I will be heading to the lab to give blood and pick up containers for my stool study. Yee. Haw. And then to the post office. My mom is actually going to receive her package this week. Amazing.

Also in the mail will be issues of the current Emerald Pillows, the March second anniversary issue, which will be heading off to four bookstores, BookWoman in Austin, Bluestockings in New York City, Lambda Rising in Norfolk, and A Different Light in San Francisco. Hopefully there will be response, but even if not, we will send to those four bookstores for a while to see where it takes us.

There is a need for some sort of focus, but I am just following my brain on any tangent that pops up on the path in order to find it. Conflicted?

Embracing the neti pot

The neti pot has been prescribed by my ayurveda doc to assist in the reduction of mucousy crud I have been experiencing lately. Actually, he says it is one of the five simple things one can do daily to improvegeneral health. One of the five must-dos for everyone on the planet. Additionally, my yogi has long been an active supporter of the neti pot offering frequent demonstrations.

It has taken me months to get past the eww factor and get to it. I have reasoned it away as me being so much less allergy affected this year then any year recently, and just been saying soon. Elizabeth is braver than I am and has been using it somewhat regularly for a while now. Maybe since the yoga retreat last May, though I am not quite sure that is when she got it.

You fill the pot with pure water, nuke or other wise heat it to a warm body temperature, and then add a half teaspoon kosher salt. I find that for our microwave, 30 seconds is just about right. If that feels too warm, then I just add a little more unheated water. You then tuck your chin and tip your head sideways over the sink so your nostrils are lined up one on top of the other. The spout is placed at the upper nostril and gravity facilitates the hot salinated water on its journey. It is not recommended that you begin this when you are already plugged up. The hot water virtually melts the snot right out of your nose.

Really.

Then you pause with your head straightened out over the sink for water to drain back and do the other side. I have tissue waiting. Even though I thought I was clear, I still had a decent stream of snot running out of my nose.

"...down her nose
(snort, snort)
down her nose
(snort, snort)
and she whistled while the (snort) ran down her nose..."

A special prize to anyone who knows the name of that song!!

The worst that can happen is you don't tuck your chin enough and the warm salted water runs down your throat.

Our next foray into my as-of-late medical life experiences will be the colonoscopy tour. Woo!

Home Sweet Home

Safely.

Sane.

I got so distracted

I meant to post about my newest of guilty pleasures but got distracted by the topic of that fucker who hit me.

E! Entertainment Television has some pretty bad shows. One of my favorite E! guilty pleasures was Howard Stern. Politically incorrect always, but I just think his ability to be frank and mostly uncensored is funny. Sure he's a sexist pig, but he is so blatant and honest about it and my inner sexist pig finds him somehow refreshing. But in small doses.

I also got addicted to the Anna Nicole show. All Anna, all the time. I was intrigued mostly because she was able to sustain a show for two years and she is just so vapid. Bad, bad, bad TV. I don't really watch TV anymore, so for something like this to catch my attention, if nothing else, ammuses E (my partner not the channel) I am sure.

This past week I have not one, but two new E! shows which have my attention. The Gastineau Girls is a mother daughter socialite duo, yes, vapid x2, and I am hooked. Hooked is of course, a relative term. I won't exactly seek it out, but I will watch it when I come across it. I am not sure, but the other show, Love Is In The Heir, is either a jump up or down the vapid ladder. Princess Anne Claire is a hoot if only because she aspires to be a couintry singer/songwriter and she is just awful.

Train wreck TV.

If I wasn't on vacation in 20 hours I would be so much more pissed

Sumbitch in his new infinity hit my front bumper this afternoon. I imagine he would argue I hit his front bumper, but he would be wrong.

While waiting to exit the bank, a kind driver faery was going to let me turn left past his single lane of traffic waiting to enter the freeway feeder road. Single lane.

Douchebag in his new infinity suv pulls around crossing a double yellow line to get ahead of traffic. He was going like no tomorrow. I was virtually still. Crack.

Really, we barely hit, but both opur bumpers suffered similar cracks down to the metal and I want my new car fixed. soon. will have to wait til after vaca.

I called his insurance right away on the advice of my insurance lady so we will wait and see what happens.

Fuckers, the whole lot of them i wager.

We have the March issue of EP out the door and distributed around town, and today we made extra copies to take to NYC. Thinking global.

And it's morning

I am not quite sure what is flying around in my being this morning. The craminess from last night subsided before I went to bed so at least that has left me for the time being. I am feeling it is time to commit myself to geting some writing going on in book form and I am not quite sure if that means plugging away at fiction, possibly expanding "Alex", or if it might mean a collection of memoirs. It is my hope that I figure it out soon so I can just get on with it.

I have been reformatting some files recently and I suppose this is where all this stems from. When I got the MAc, I transferred everything I had recovered off my old laptop which ended up being a bit of a chore. I actually had to open the files on the desktop pc from a cd the Mac would not read, and then I had to email them all to myself. I then took the email and usin a Word trial offer, turned them all in to Word documents whhich I was assured would be readable by the Mac even if I chose not to buy Word for MAc.

Well, trial over, Word for Mac is $400 and not, IMO, worth it since I am just writing. I do not need all the formatting bells and whistles and MAc offers two different programs which do more than enough for me.

So, the dilemma is now this: All the Word documents a couple hundred of them, are needing to be opened with a different program rather than a one click on the file to open them. It is aggravating to say the least, but the text was not lost, so I am not compaining too much.

I might send a note to a publisher I know and ask her how I might resolve the issue of which type of book to pursue. And I might just start doing it and see what unfolds before me in a muse following sort of fashion.

Or both.

Are ulcers genetic?

Maybe all my problems can be blamed on my pop. My medical problems that is. I have been wondering lately if perhaps my intestinal woe is nothing more (or less) than an ulcer. My boss and I were discussing this yesterday and she said I was the last person she would suspect of ever having ulcers. I am just too calm.

But isn't an ulcer better than anything requiring a colonoscopy to diagnose?

[Picture me shuddering]

I have had little variety in my diet since the big purge on Sunday. Today, I got home and decided a bagel with a bare minimum of peanut butter would be an acceptable risk. Last night I had pasta with spinach, shrimp and sundried tomatoes, not a good risk, so a bagel seemed harmless enough.

I ate it without incident and also had some mango. Then I took a nap and before going to see Beth and Irina tonight, I had a second bagel as I was still a little hungry.

We went to see our friends because it was time for me to hilite Irina's hair. While there we also watched the L Word (yawn) and Fat Actress (chuckle). While sitting there I started getting these crampy feelings in my stomach. It was definitely up in my stomache, too. Very localized. I was able to breathe through it much like you might breathe through a labor contraction.

It got me to thinking about when I was a kid and my dad was never found without a bottle of Mylanta in his upper shirt pocket.

Re:[shudder]

So I am going to put peanut butter on the no list for the next bagel and see what happens. Then, I am going to concentrate on vacation and its close-but-not-close-enough proximity. This time next week I will be better, I swear (NYC awaits!)

Detox update

So I made it a day. The detox gave me the worst headache I have ever experienced. Maybe one of the worst 5 anyway. I know it is a normal side effect of the process and can last up to three days and here I am, day three, with that damn headache lingering.

I waited until I was really hungry to eat on day two which was yesterday. I ate about half a bowl of the Kitchari and decided I just could not do it. I graciously accepted defeat in the form of a couple of plain english butter cookies. About an hour later I worked up to a banana and then I made myself some pasta around 7pm.

When E had her evening bowl of gruel, the smell was nauseating to me.

Nauseating.

In yoga today I had a hard time concentrating to work through poses. A couple of time I felt somewhat dizzy and ended up feet up the wall resting. My yogi knows I have some crud invading my peace, so she told me to just go with it and do what I could, and if my body says rest, that I should listen. So, I listened.

I am at Panera at the moment having just had a cup of tea and not really being hungry for anything else, so I will wait to eat. I am thinking maybe just wonton soup from PF Chang's for lunch/dinner when I get my break around 4.

Maybe some chai, yes, that sounds right.

24 hours and three rolls of toilet paper later...

I have had this intestinal crud (that is the polite description) going on since about xmas. I went to the doc on February 23rd and she did bloodwork and an exam and gave me a referral to a GI doc whose first appointment is April 7th. My bloodwork cam e back great, the only concern being that I am still(duh) anemic.

I have also begun seeing an Ayurvedic doc. That would be Dr. Rob. He and Ayurveda were introduced to me through my yoga center, and rather than airy-faery quackery, a lot of it seems to make sense to me in theory and a lot of it is a sort of preventative medicine. Take care of yourself in the first place, and you might not get sick.

Dr. Rob's first order was to cut out milk. This made a huge difference, but did not eliminate the problem entirely. When I say Dr.Rob again, he saud I needed to do a detox. This is something he recommends between seasons to everyone or at least once a year as a spring cleaning for your body.

Squeaky clean. That's me.

The detox begins witha Fleet's oral enema mixed with water. Drink it down and follow with lots of water. "Expect 4-5 watery bowel movements thoughout the day" Umm...let's just remove the y from watery and stay on the throne all afternoon.

The detoxincludes eating nothing but Kitchari, an Indian rice dish made with spices which continue to draw toxins from your system. Kitchari only for 7 days. I could stand it for one day. I might be able to stand it for three or four days. Seven days is way more than optimistic.

It was such a delight to wake up this morning and pee. I did my business and then pfffft...I farted. Wow! No more water(y) bowel movements.

Yesterday, E and I decided it was our last chance to get the fig tree down. It has been long overgrown into the neighbors yard. Not in itself a problem, but it was about 10 feet tall and that portion of the tree was robbing the rest of the tree and it began to rot and weaken in places. It was also growing further into some wires.

During the process of removing cut limbs, the first one I removed actually, I found a hole in the front yard. I found it by turning my ankle and falling. Badly. Never a good plan when you are detoxing. "Nuff said.

I went inside and cleaned up and the horror of the fall hit me and I just sat there and cried. It was a good cry. Not had one in a while. Ah, release.

If Wrecks flops his heavy bony ass on my hurt foot one more time he might find himself in his crate for the day.

Time for some mindless TV and Nikita.